Monday, March 24, 2008
My internet has gone bonkers, and its ridiculously slow.
So during this beautiful easter break, I am flooded with essays, assignments, revisions and tutorial work. All stuffed up in a nice easter egg for me. How nice. Thank God there's people accompanying me through these disgusting work. First its Rubhi, always with me in the first floor common room. People think that we are studying the same thing. Hehe. Anyway, then it was Keyne, Kay, Natsuki, Genny and Renata popping in once in a while. Had lots of fun laughing at random things. Hah. Rubhi is once again crowned craziest kid once again, as always. Gosh, I shan't embarass her here. hehe. Ruins her reputation.
Oh, we spent quite a while camwhoring ytd with her webcam. Cos it was super speed, so we started making real life cartoon effect. So funny. hehe. Today we were learning how to speak English. And I wonder what is going to happen tomorrow. (: hm...
Cooked for Rubhi today, turned out quite alright considering I haven't cooked for a year. Yay. She's like an amateur trinity kid, freaking out for term 1 exams(its worth 5%), calling tute as "toote". hah. Hang in there, buddy. You will survive. Its only 2 days. compared to a whole full week or maybe even 2 during term 3 and 4, this is nothing. Will be praying for you. I wonder if she sees this. (oh yes, her internet died). Oh wells, I am just talking to myself.
As you can see, I am getting more comfortable in my hostel this year than last year. So much more actually. I am making some fun, cool friends, but also some that I can share my thoughts with, friends that I can trust. And that's amazing. So Thank God. Also currently attending Richmond AOG which is just 5 mins walk away, and it has amazing worship and service. This really fulfill what God teaches us. When we learn to let go, and let him lead the way, the path ahead of me will be the best I can ever imagine. I am starting, trying to let go, its not an easy thing, but I will try. If God can create miracles, the very least I can do is to let him do it.
I suppose sometimes it is expectation that is stopping us from letting go. Because letting go means I am no longer in control and I dont know what to expect. No doubt living in fear is living without faith, but there's always a bit of me that is hoping that I can get the thing I want immediately. This is probably the reason why sometimes I fall hard. When I expect too much out of something, like frienships, it just doesn't turn out the way you want and expected it to be. Especially in the surrounding I am in, making friends isnt easy, making truthful friends; people that will stand by you, is almost impossible. So when desperation starts to overcome you, everyone you meet and say Hi to, you have this strong hope and desire that he or she will be your great friend for life. Thats when expectation overides reality, and when you do everything by your will and power. That's when God is no longer in control. And that's when I screw up.
I am hoping to change.
In God I trust. Walking in Faith.
