Saturday, August 23, 2008
"... and so I will Serve, with Love and in Truth."
This was what went through my mind over and over again today. Its a message from God. Just to remind me of who I am, and what my purpose is.
Its like the end of a sentence. An end to a period. An end to a section of my life. But this is how it will end. No matter what I've done. No matter what I am doing. No matter what I will be doing... I will Serve under God's calling. Wherever I may be, I will open my heart for God to guide me, so that I can be a guide to someone else who still lives in Darkness; To love them and bring them to the Truth and the Light.
That's my Life. That's my identity. That's what God wants me to be. That's a calling.
Obedience comes next.
--
As I look back to the quotes I noted down; that I pick up from everywhere. Quotes that held so much meaning. They all seem to have one thing in common. Truth.
And I asked God why. Why Truth? Why not wisdom? Why not endurance? Why not patience? Isnt that what I need, Isnt that the things that are lacking in me?
Then again, it struck me.
Have I been living a life true to myself? True to God?
I probably have, but probably not to the extent of what God wants. He wants so much more from me. Because He knows how much more I can go. And once again, He keeps bringing "Truth" into my life because He knows that it is Truth that will shape me. And indeed, based on "Truth", it has shaped my Life to what it is today. And I have to hold on to that. Hold on to it so dearly because that is my identity in God.
Being true to God. Being true to myself. Being true to people.
There will be distractions. There will be times that I will sway away for the Truth, and just hide in the darkness for a while. But God is constantly driving me out. No doubt it gets draining and exhaustng to always stand in the Light. Its so easy and 'joyful' to just hang around in the Darkness, ride along with the crowd, but God didnt make me that way. I cant deny that I havent fully live up to God's expectations yet. Not even close. But I thank Him so much, so much for putting some amazing people in my life. To constantly remind me, constantly encourage me and most importantly Inspire me, to stand back up and do God's will and walk the path of Light.
Have I been true to myself? True to God's will?
Because of that, I start to question whether what I am doing now is God's will? Or am I just doing it just for the fun of it. Just because its fun to 'serve' and help people. Make them smile. Of course, serving God is awesome, its an honour. But is it where my focus should be? I am extremely clear that kid's alive is for me. But what about all the others that people have been asking me to go? Its fun, yes. But is it where I should be spending my time?
That's why I am stepping one step back. Just putting certain things on hold for a moment. Just to put God's will into perspective. The past few weeks have been a blur. Suddenly, I am so concentrating in the "fun" bit of serving, I blocked out God's voice.
Right now, I am gonna step back and step out of the buzz, and just listen again to what God wants me to do. Not just in terms of serving. But every aspect of my life. The whole way through studies and friendship.
Everything...
Let your will be done...
As we Love, Be lifted High
In my Life, Be lifted High
